If you can’t be kind, at least be vague
There is no such thing as fun for the whole family
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much
Instant gratification takes too long
“Is that a wig you got on?”
“Your drawings are the reason people invented the Hyperpigmentation meme”
“Without your wig your head would look like a cantaloupe”
are those even lines or roasts💀
Edit:
“I like trains”
“Why are cupcakes not in a cup?”
“Why are oranges orange?”
here are some random joke I came up with @SeamlessMoon
what happens to illegally parked frog it gets toad away
what did the DNA say to the other DNA “do these genes make me look f A t?”
what do you call a bear without teeth ? a gummy bear
The reason some politicians like to stand on their record is to keep voters from examining it.
The insomnia patient was such a fervent vegetarian that he counted carrots jumping over a fence.
You’ll always stay young if you live honestly, eat slowly, sleep sufficiently, work industriously, worship faithfully and lie about your age.
How can you tell you’re getting old When you go to an antique auction and three people bid on you.
There’s a lot to be said in his favor, but it’s not nearly as interesting.
What’s a dog’s favorite homework assignment? A lab report.
. Among the things that are so simple even a child can operate them are parents.
Of course I wouldn’t say anything about her unless I could say something good. And, oh boy, is this good …
“why does your head look similar to that of a cantoloupe?”
“you’re the reason the universe actually has a sense of humor”
“your fingers look like cheeto puffs on steroids”
“JEREMY, WHY DID YOU DOOR ON THE KNOCK?!”
“your face is similar to that of the blade ball’s dramatic block after block trends”
“you look like the Minecraft skits with the titles saying DONT CHECK THE SOUND!!”
“I like drinking pizza”
“after mastering these skills, you will be pulling girls so hard you’ll become a national threat”
“66+44=100”
“did you know you can drink the ocean in one sip?”
“M0M, AM I ADOPTED?”
“I eat electric eels because they taste funny”
“WELCOME TO THE NEXT MR B3AST VIDEO! TODAY ILL BE PUTTING 100 MEN VS 1 GORILLA!”
" Grass is a type of plant with narrow leaves growing from the base. Their appearance as a common plant was in the mid-Cretaceous period. There are 12,000 species now.[3]
A common kind of grass is used to cover the ground in places such as lawns and parks. Grass is usually the color green. That is because they are wind-pollinated rather than insect-pollinated, so they do not have to attract insects. Green is the best color for photosynthesis.
When @VWOOM talks, it isn’t a conversation. It’s a filibuster.
She leaves me with the feeling that when we bury the hatchet she’ll mark the exact spot.
